Standing strong

Alexis Rae Baker

Dear Lexis,

Life’s been hitting pretty hard lately and I’m finding it difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Have you ever dealt with something like this? How did you cope?

Thanks,

Still Standing in Lacey

Dear Still Standing,

I absolutely have dealt with moments like this in my life and I agree that they are difficult, fairly hopeless moments. I remember feeling like I was trapped in a cave, wondering without any sense of direction, praying that I would eventually see the sun again.

I’m sure many would say I was depressed, but really I was just exhausted. I knew that I just had to keep going, had to keep pushing through, and that eventually, I would run out of dead ends.

The interesting thing about moments like this is that they teach you how to surrender.

We spend so much of our lives trying to “make” life happen in the way that we want it to. But, we can’t actually “make” life happen, instead by trying to “make” life happen, we often slow down the process. We get in the way and then we wind up in these darker moments where surrender is our only choice.

So, as dark as this time can be, it’s actually a time of great movement. Life’s essentially forcing you to stop interfering so that it can bring you what you’re actually looking for.

Now is not the time to take action, now is the time to breathe and relax. The hits may keep coming for a while, but the faster you surrender to the process, the less impact they have. And then, one day, without any work on your part, the sun will rise again and you’ll look around in wonder at what this time of struggle has created.

It can be hard to trust, I know, but as long as you keep going, you will emerge into the light again.

Trust the process and know that the world is working out for you.

Best wishes,

-Lexis

Lexis is Alexis Rae Baker. She writes from her home in Olympia.  Got a question about life, relationships, spirit? Visit her at lexisrae.com or write to Lexis at  Lexis@theJOLTnews.com 

EDITOR'S NOTE:  If you or a loved one is in a crisis and need support, click here for the Crisis Clinic hotline.   For Olympia SafePlace links for domestic abuse support and more, click here.

EDITOR'S NOTE: The opinions expressed above are those of Alexis Rae Baker and not necessarily of The JOLT or its staff or board of directors. Alexis Rae Baker is not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. Her advice does not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals.