Every wedding has that one moment you always remember…or maybe two…

The Beginning…

How do you put together a wedding in your yard? It takes quite a bit of planning.

Announcements go out about the big day.  My daughter, her daughter (the bride to be) and the bride’s sister begin shopping to find the right bridal gown. Everyone, including the groom, immediately goes on a diet.

Cakes, one for the bride and one for the groom have to be decided upon so her sister, a Cordon Bleu Pastry Chef, can gather what she needs to create them. And of course, cake toppers for each cake must be selected. Food options must be explored and the dinner selections made, and ordered along with drinks.

Decorations must be ordered and delivered daily for weeks before the big day. Amazon, Fed Ex, and UPS drivers pass each other in the driveway, delivering things ordered from all over the country – lanterns and vases for tables, clear balls with battery operated lights that fit inside, and crystal chains to hang them with from many of the trees along the driveway and yard. Twinkling lights are strung on yet more trees. These lights, happily came with a remote control. 

Plates, napkins, silverware, and glasses arrive, tables, chairs and tablecloths are reserved.

This is a second marriage for both the bride and groom, so the younger children’s outfits have to be shopped for. Adult children in other states arrange for vacation time and purchase airline tickets.

Menu planning is necessary and major multiple shopping trips to Costco, Fred Meyer and Ralph’s Thriftway will be necessary to feed all these people before the wedding.

Family members start to arrive about a week before the wedding, along with the grooms’ parents. When everyone is here, California, Arizona, Montana, and Washington family members and friends will all get together for the first time since COVID.

Several trips to the airport later, most of the family was here by the 4^th of July. When everyone is here, every bed will be filled and four camping trailers will be added to the mix. Friends will be staying local Air B&BS.

In the meantime, baking begins, salads are made, and BBQing starts, so we can feed those already here.

Next comes the decision that although between everyone living on the property, we have six bathrooms, a porta-potty will be needed. This is promptly ordered for delivery a few days before the event when guests will begin to arrive.

Moment #1

The Porta-Potty was delivered and set up. Shortly thereafter, the grooms’ son, twelve-year-old Quinton, raced inside and breathlessly announced, “You guys! You have to come see the porta-potty! It is awesome!"

Now, you, perhaps like us, may be wondering how a porta-potty could possibly be described as awesome. But Quinton kept going on and on about it, so finally, some of the 20-year-olds went to see what he was talking about.

Shortly thereafter they returned and confirmed Quinton’s assessment. That porta-potty is awesome!

More and more people were overcome with curiosity and went to check it out. More rave reviews promptly ensued. Finally, I had to go see what the fuss was all about.

First of all, it was a double porta-potty. There were two doors, one marked men and one women. Poking my head inside the women’s,’ I saw luxurious vinyl flooring, a lighted mirror, a porcelain sink, several storage cabinets, a real flushing toilet and the clincher for me, air conditioning. It was forecasted to be 90 degrees on my granddaughter’s wedding day, so the “Awesome” description I kept hearing made perfect sense.

Of course, all this had to be absorbed before I even realized there was classical music playing softly in the background.

Moment #2:

The wedding ceremony went off without a hitch. The bride was lovely and so was the setting. However, the food that had been ordered and paid for from Tumwater’s Flaming Pig, was never delivered. Phone calls to the business went straight to voice mail.

A family member rushed over there and came back with a picture of a sign on the door that read “closed due to management emergency.” We received no call, text, or message alerting us to the fact the food would not be delivered to the reception. The sign stated refunds would be issued, but refunds, (still not received) don’t feed fifty people.

Luckily my family is nothing if not resourceful. A phone call later provided the delivery of a plethora of pizzas, while family members whipped up salads and the celebration continued.

And all night long, everywhere I turned I kept hearing the same refrain…” have you been inside the porta-potty yet? It is Awesome!”

Kathleen Anderson writes this column each week from her home in Olympia. Contact her at  kathleen@theJOLTnews.com or post your comment